BIG Hair, Don’t Care!

Taken from her LinkedIn profile. I’ve spent the better part of the last week trying to determine if 1) this woman’s hair was blown up to 3x its natural size or if 2) this woman’s head was shrunken down to a pin. Is there a camera filter that reduces flesh but leaves inanimate objects unadulterated? Can someone please get this woman a fucking coif?!? She looks like the woman from Mars Attacks, if her hairdo sank down another 12 inches:

Speaking of awesome hairdos, I bumped into a suggested contact on LinkedIn who’s trying a littttttle too hard to mimic our stable genius who’s currently enjoying his position in Lady Liberty’s oval…office:

And finally, the world’s best intro for a LinkedIn profile below. The guy is a customer service representative and was previously a lacrosse coach after graduating from Illinois State University.

Did he just google “business buzzword” and start listing shit?!? There’s more linear thinking in the Oval Office than in this profile.

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