Catching yourself ogling other mens’ larger-than-life pieces? Wishing you were holding their faces in your loving embrace? Then you’ll appreciate these two gorgeous watches from our Swiss friends in…Switzerland! But first, what do you call a grandfather clock? An old timer. Why did the scientist drop the watch into his flask? He was looking for a timely solution. What do you call a story that one clock tells the other? Second hand information. BONUS: Did you hear the one about the guy who founded Lifesavers? He made a mint!
You all seemed to like the Arch Stanton posting about controversial opinions. MANY positive responses to that post – let me bring you all back down to Earth with some boring caboose poop:
The Patek Philippe Sky Moon Tourbillon is EPIC and goes for ~$1.2 – $1.4 million. No doubt on the higher end, but likely to appreciate in value. Not much additional value to add here beyond the beauty of the thing. The Sky Moon Tourbillon photos:
The next beauty is the Hublot MP-05 LaFerrari. This thing was designed in partnership with Ferrari as the Italian car company designed and released its LaFerrari model in 2013. The watch was designed to look and feel like the car and does look pretty stellar. Side note, the car sorta sucks compared to the Ferrari 458 but they can’t all be winners (Ferrari: please don’t send your corporate myrmidons after me!). The watch can be yours for roughly $300,000…or 50,000 acres in deeply indebted, socialist Italy. Keep up the good economic work! Photos for your perusal:
What dog always knows the time? A watch dog.
HEY-OOOOOOO!!!! So who among you is into Christianity and religion? Great, watch this wonderful video on YouTube titled George Carlin on Christianity. He nails it. Next, read Richard Dawkins’ The God Delusion because it’s well worth your time if you’re considering pissing away your life on the invisible man in the sky.
Next, who among you are video gamers? Great, you’re not pissing away your life in the slightest. Righteous, broheim. Here’s a YouTube video on how Halo Changed Everything. The guy brings up some solid points that made my neckbeard wither with delight. I’d also suggest that the GTA series changed everything as well. Halo 1 and 2, as well as GTA Vice City and V, are the greatest games ever made. Tangentially, here’s a photo you guys/gals will find interesting:
And another photo that will strike a little too close to home for the bad hombres out there:
And finally, which one of these six stores isn’t like the others?
And finally finally, I was home visiting my family last month when a family member entered the room with the following watch. Made. My. Day.
“If you’ve got them by the balls, their hearts and minds will follow” – Theodore Roosevelt
Begin fluffing your neckbeards, here’s something a friend recently sent:
I just played a game against DoubleTeaming. He opts for the roach ravager timing attack. I surrender my third base and valiantly hold back, massing up my roach defenses and waiting for my upgrades to finish. His ravagers launch corrosive bile and destroy one of my evolution chambers. Only the attack upgrade will finish, I realize. Will it be enough? At the last possible second, I form the perfect concave and push out. My upgrade advantage is too potent. As I decimate my opponent’s army, his Zerg turn and flee. The remnants of my brood give chase until they encounter my enemy’s swarming reinforcements, now equipped with the speed upgrade. A Great War of Attrition begins, with my roaches valiantly meeting his roaches and hydralisks in the center of the map. As the war rages on, his hydralisks finally begin to gain ground. DoubleTeaming starts to push closer and closer. Now, only one line of my roaches stands between him and my drones. This is it. Suddenly, the sound of a shrieking giant worm bursting forth from the ground. It is the sound of my enemy’s annihilation. Ten of my ultralisks emerge from the Nydus Worm I have placed behind his army. As their great tusks slice his army to pieces, my opponent types “g,” and leaves the game. So hasty was he to abandon the sight of his utter destruction that he could not even manage “gg.”
Today’s song of the day is a shout-out to the nineties, a time when, confusingly enough, presidential rape culture was out and Bill “Slick Willy” Clinton was in (source: 105th United States Congress). It’s Ghetto Supastar by Pras.
Many of you are familiar with the character of Ricky Bobby in Will Ferrell’s Talladega Nights:
Now what you may not know, may surprise you. In yesteryear, Ricky Bobby would ride with his homeboy, Bobby Mugabe. Today, it may all seem like ancient lore, but Bobby Mugabe still carries the remnants of his…checkered past:
You can’t escape your heritage, Bobby Mugabe:
It’s in your blood! Speaking of tradition, who’s excited for some turkey and stuffing this holiday? Nahhh. Fuck it. Turkey is consistently dry and tastes like dog shit, but, it’s the holidays, so
Well, I’m off to look at vacation packages. Oh shit! Half off on cruises from New Orleans to Puerto Rico…and following hurricanes Nate and Maria, I’m guessing you can find a cruise offering door-to-door service… or is that not funny yet?
And finally, I found the following license plate which reminded me of the FPS Doug video from back in the day:
Congratulations! You’ve put up with my locker room talk for an entire posting! A second song of the day is Moving Mountains by The Brevet.
May The Reagan be with you.
But before I dive in head first (like Pete Rose), if you received the “Random Bidtits (10/4/2017)” email but didn’t read the post online, you’re missing out on a final paragraph following the photo of the porn stars (how many blogs can begin with this). Posted that mofo before it was finished.
As for the topic of this post, we’ve again been graced with the boundless insights of the Meditative Mandarin. He shared a story about Isaac Newton:
“If I have seen further, it is by standing on the shoulders of giants.”
The enterprise of mankind as embodied in our advance of knowledge is built on the pattern of Shoulders of Giants. Human knowledge and understanding is a very cumulative affair.
The quotation above was written by Isaac Newton as a backhanded insult directed squarely at Robert Hooke (1635-1702), with whom Newton carried on a life long, bitter rivalry. Newton used this quote in a letter responding to Hooke’s claim that Newton stole the hypothesis on light from Hooke’s “Micrographia.” Newton was familiar with Micrographia and claimed that Hooke took much of the work from Descartes who – claimed Newton – took his work from Marcantonia de Dominis and Ariotto. The comment was very likely intended to be sarcastic as Hooke was a very short man, practically a midget.
Enough on Newton. Now let’s talk about achieving his level of brilliance. Start fluffing your neckbeards. Study: Playing Starcraft can Increase your Cognitive Abilities
Who here remembers the GTA series from our youth? If so, you will remember the Faggio: a parody of both Vespa and Piaggio. Here’s a photo from the game:
Cool, right? Well I came across the ULTIMATE Faggio last weekend. Huge faggio move. Big league faggio. Thanks, guy.
Dick move when I’m desperately searching for parking. The guy is probably in the bar, sipping on a tall cool one:
Book plug time. I read/listen to a book every two weeks and have been experimenting lately. One that HAS to be on your list, even if you have but only the faintest interest in this stuff, is Neil DeGrasse Tyson’s Astrophysics for People in a Hurry. Run to your library (or use the free Hoopla app for your phone) and get this book. When Amazon recommends “Origins” by NDT, don’t worry, you basically already read it if you got through Astrophysics for Hombres in a Hurry.
Oh! Is anyone up for a game? Back, wayyyy back, before The Cookie Monster gave up carbs (cookies) for…well for other carbs (fruits and veggies), and before Mitt Romney threatened to put a bullet in Big Bird and cut funding, there was a game Big Bird played that he/she/it called One of These Things (although not every episode centered around him playing with his “yummy yummy bird seed,” even going as far as burying his/her/confused/undecided/but likely his nose in it). Now I leave it to you: which one of these things is not like the others:
It’s hard to find so I’ll give you a hint: it’s in the middle up near the top, it’s small and undistinguished, it’s pink, and sometimes it can be hard to find in the broader sea of undulating movements.
And finally, food porn time!!!